Keeping The Kid from shrinking

This is a hard post for me to write because I know sexism is alive and well in American culture. I've witnessed it first hand, and women are just as likely to be the perpetrator as men. I've watched female colleagues labeled as obstinate and problem employees for expressing the same concerns in the same meeting that I have expressed, when I walk away unscathed by criticism. Our collective sexist culture exists in families as well, where sons can do no wrong and daughters are told to stop provoking their brothers. There are multitudes of statistics and studies that point to male bias in the workplace and in families as well.

I am not here to debate that, although I still have trouble wrapping my mind around the alleged superiority of one gender over another. Instead, I'm trying to learn how I can help my daughter from feeling that she needs to shrink herself, or deprive herself in order to keep the peace in the workplace or in a relationship. 

All women deserve a chance to be educated, to be equal partners in relationships, to have a fair shot at a fulfilling career, to determine when or if they give birth. How do I make sure The Kid knows this? 

This video is forcing me to think about my ideals in a different light. Are they important enough to want to pass to my daughter? If they are, how do I pass them to her in a way that will help guide her as an adult? Am I ready for her to reject the ideals that I hold dear? The only thing that is clear to me is trying to force her to believe as I do will backfire. The rest, I'm afraid, is going to be trial and error. I wish there was a better answer because I don't want my daughter to feel like she needs to shrink to be accepted.

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